You don't live in the United States of America.

Today we spend the vast majority of our time on the Internet. Social media, news articles, online video games - the list goes on. Of course this is not true for everyone; grandpa might have a Facebook, but he's probably more interested in pictures of his grandkids than in validating conspiracy theories. The Internet has granted companies near constant access to our most valuable economic resource; our data. 'The new dollar'. Every time you scroll through Instagram, Google “who killed jimmy hoffa”, or ask Siri for directions to the banana-stand, you are revealing something about your identity - paying a tax.

What are you getting out of it? Do the ends justify the means?

We pay taxes so we that can enjoy certain things - drinking fountains, roads, etc. Or at least that’s the intended outcome. When you submit your data online you are instead granted access to the platform itself - regardless of whether it harbors alongside it semi-crippling social anxiety or fake-news. The provisions distributed by these services are not indispensable like those provided by governments, paved roads and health care (sometimes) included. Having access to healthcare is somewhat more ‘essential’ than being able to watch Netflix. This is why state taxes are enforceable, obligatory; the associated provisions are indispensable. Sharing data is voluntary. You don't have to agree to Apple's Terms and Conditions - but you will if it means you get to use their products.

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I closed my eyes and tried to ignore the perfume of hashish and reggaeton poisoning the air. For a moment my strategy worked. I began to doze off, ass in the sand, the Atlantic lapping at my feet. I was abruptly awoken when someone (Annie I figured) tapped me on the shoulder.

I looked up and instead was met by a grinning Nigerian man peddling fake Ray-Bans up and down the beach. He nodded towards his makeshift display and said something in quick Portuguese. I shook my head No and got up to leave. Turning away from the ocean and towards the city behind me I spotted Annie, who was staring intensely at something across the street. She pulled out her phone to check something. She sensed me eavesdropping and spun around, motioning me over.

Annie smiled and pointed again as I waddled through the sand. I looked where she was pointing and shrugged. “That’s my firm,” she proclaimed. The sign above the building read ‘JLL’ which stood for Fuck-All as far as I was concerned. I was about to remark on the coincidence (small world, eh?) so we could move on to a brighter subject, but she was already gone. Annie had crossed the street and was pushing through the revolving glass door.

Annie came out just fine, proudly displaying photos of her, all duck-faces and peace-signs posing in front of her company's branding. At the time the incident didn’t mean much to me. I had other things on my mind - mainly finding the nearest bar serving Super Bock and something porky/fatty to eat.

I later realized that in this moment my friend’s identity as an employee of ‘JLL’ had overcome her identity as an American or a Denverite. Whereas Annie would normally refrain from taking selfies with a bunch of Portuguese desk-jockeys, in this moment she felt they were one-and-the-same. She was no longer American, ‘one of us’. She became something else entirely.

The central question behind this phenomenon has to do with identity; what are the boundaries of our identities? Are we more than just conjoined fragments of different aspects of ourselves, a non-emulsified muddle of ‘student’, ‘cheerleader’, ‘Chinese-American’ and ‘real-estate agent’? What justifies our identity?

In this case Annie’s identity was determined by the company that she works for. This bond is so strong that she would willingly enter a random edifice in Cascais, Portugal just to declare her loyalty. Company loyalty is roused by fair treatment of employees; Annie receives benefits (her salary) for the ‘taxes’ she pays to her company (her work input). Loyalty also fluctuates according to geographic variables. Whereas Annie’s ‘JLL’ identity typically remains somewhat dormant, in this case it was unboxed by the presence of a physical space, one where JLL employees are made separate and identifiable from the rest of the population.

So what would happen if JLL took advantage of its global real-estate holdings and declared independence? Individuals living/working within a 2-block radius of JLL properties would now be under the jurisdiction of a sovereign JLL regime. Sounds crazy, huh? Why would JLL (or any other company for that matter) ever do such a thing? Why choose to become a state?

Simply put, the advantages of self-governance are undeniable. There are rational economic benefits to doing so. You gain the ability to bargain with other state-actors. States have access to massive resource pools that are inaccessible to most corporate bodies. It is inordinately difficult for corporations to negotiate treaties with state-actors. Although globalization and technology have greatly reduced the barriers to doing so, we still very rarely see collaboration between states and corporations. Take for example the 2015 dispute between Apple and the FBI. The FBI requested backdoor-provisions into Apple’s iOS platform in order to investigate suspected terrorist actions. Apple refused. Unfortunately for Mr. Cook, that conflict ended in the FBI’s favor.

Asides from economic enlargement, there are also sociological benefits that come from a rise to the state-level. Countries can bring their version of the ‘ideal’ society to fruition, whereas corporations are held in check by those countries' governments. As the figureheads of our societies, governments are able to emphasize the values they believe are best suited for us. By becoming a state, a corporation could make its desired social arrangement a reality. These changes could be as radical as a SpaceX-sponsored mission for interplanetary colonization or as subtle as simple self-accountability. These values are clear and present; company slogans/mission statements reveal what is socially pertinent to any given firm. Google’s infamous motto ‘Don’t Be Evil’ might be indicative of their ideal societal arrangement, as might Facebook’s (former) ‘Move Fast and Break Things”.

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I think that the future involves the corporate state. This is not merely out of some desire to embellish science-fiction narratives. When I flip on the news I see an ongoing & massive transfer of power from governments to corporations. Apple’s aforementioned feud with the FBI over backdoor provisions shows that they are willing to challenge government bodies.

In defiance of the United States and its inconsistent trade policy with foreign states like Russia and China, Apple says they've had enough. After enjoying a glass of his favorite merlot (Hall Wines), Apple CEO Tim Cook announces an emergency Special Event so that he can announce the company’s acquisition of the state of South Dakota. At the event, he briefly makes news of the company’s new plans:

Apple believes that we are on the face of the earth to make great products - and that’s not changing. At Apple, we believe that if you embrace that the things that you can do are limitless, you can put your ding in the universe. You can change the world.
That’s why I would like to take this opportunity to announce our secession from the United States. The territory formerly known as South Dakota will from this day forth be regarded as Applonia. We look forward to bringing you our newest line of beautifully designed and future-driven products.*

And oh, yeah - suck my dick, Bezos.

* Not based on real-life statements. Mostly. Please don’t sue.

You might be asking, Do they actually have the money to do this? Not to delve into details, but Apple’s valued at about 5% of America’s $19.3 trillion GDP, or ~$965 billion USD (Krishna 2019). South Dakota? About $42 billion, or ~4.4% of Apple’s valuation.

It’s safe to say that it's for sale.

Thanks to President Trump’s ingenious and well-elaborated policy of ‘getting tough’ on China, the United States flag has permanently lost one of its stars. Apple is independent.

Former South Dakotans suddenly have a huge decision to make. Salute the fresh-minted flag of Applonia, or migrate north and join their fellow-Dakotans? Their decision depends entirely on Apple’s coercive capabilities within the new territory. Luckily, Apple has already outlined some of the economic benefits to sticking around. Apple’s newly founded parliament, 'The Genius Council' is promising that existing businesses within the territory may continue operating as they were under the United States government if they so wish. Apple also ensures a ‘price match guarantee’ – taxes proportionate to those that the U.S. and South Dakotan State governments enforced - though the Council is promising lowered tax-rates for former South Dakota residents** Current Apple employees (technically bureaucrats now) will be recompensated for any relocation/moving costs the government enforces on any of its employees, and will also be rewarded with a substantial raise for their continued support. Finally, Supreme Leader Cook has outlined several impactful tax-funded initiatives, including the creation of the world’s most innovative infrastructural network as well as a promise that every home in Applonia will have both an iPhone and iPad (Siri-enabled) by 2022. Did I hear free iPad?!

In the future, Applonia’s inter-league NFL and MLB teams (the Turtlenecks and Blue Jeans, respectively) will not only offer free tickets to home games throughout their first season but will also implement exclusive programming into each game's broadcast. Applonian viewers can enjoy live commentary from Jennifer Aniston, as well as an exclusive behind-the- scenes look at the highly-anticipated new series See 2: The Deafening, starring Jason Momoa***

Time will only tell whether or not the Applonian government will succeed in overthrowing the U.S. or not, but at least they have taken the first step towards doing so.

**given they ditch Android and/or Windows, if applicable.

***content available only to Apple TV+ subscribers. See subscription details for more information.

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So why give a shit?

What if I don't care if Apple or Google tracks my every movement? Obviously we don't live in Applonia**** Hell - it's not like the government of name-a-country is worth a shit anyway. 99% of us follow whatever the Big Boss has to say, that is, the 1% that supposedly 'trickles down' to us but doesn't have to pay taxes. Maybe Tesla or Disney or Amazon or hell, anyone could do a better job than whoever in charge now. So fuck it - let it happen. I'll be the first subscriber.

What this self-righteous assumption is actually intended to be is a warning - a crazy, out-there, far-out, trippy warning - but a warning nonetheless. Yeah, the government is shitty. But they're a necessary evil. So are corporations. Nothing's free - not the device you're reading this on or the roads we drive on or the food we eat/throw-away-because-we're-'full'. Freedom's not free. We lose money/points/karma/whatever-currency-matters-most every time we choose freedom over submission. But I'd much rather pay that constant price than risk permanent bankruptcy - losing freedom.

Next time you say, "Hey Siri?", ask yourself: do the ends justify the means?

**** yet - plus I'd argue that the devices in our pockets already trap us inside that circle.

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The original idea and some of the content attributed to this post are from a project I completed in 2019, titled 'Hail, CEO! Transforming corporations into states'. That paper was written under the guidance of Professor Robert J. Carroll, a member of the University of Illinois' Political Science department - big shout out to him and to Chewie.

To read the full version of that paper, click here. To access any of Professor Carroll's work, click here.